Suzy goes to step class

Yes. I am motivated. I am going to step for the first time since November. I am ALSO going to do 10 additional minutes on the elliptical since step is only 35 minutes.

Here is my inner dialouge for the last 35 minutes:

Hmmm, I sure am glad I'm wearing this long sleeve shirt to step class. I am so clever to remember it's kind of cold in the aerobics room. (glances slyly at the other women), no one else is smart enough to wear a long sleeve shirt here, proving my superiority to these people.

Hmm, I see Susanne is teaching today. She's tough. Well, I've taken her before, I'll just have to pace myself. I mean, I've been doing step since I was 12. I was Little Miss Jazzercise for goodness' sake....and NO ONE can take THAT away from me.

(2 minutes)
Oh...that was just the warm up? Seems to be a little fast paced. Well, I can FEEL the fat burning off my body, so this is great. (stop to tie shoe lace)--ugh, that better not happen again. I hate interrupting my workout mojo.
(2 minutes)
Wow, this is a lot harder than I remember. I hate glute lifts; it's very hard to lift my enormous glutes and I should get extra points. But man, it feels great to be working out again...although it's getting kind of warm.
(2 minutes)
Whew--this is officially sucking. We didn't stretch. When are we going to stretch? That's my favorite part. God I'm hot.
(2 minutes)
OMG WHERE AM I?  WHAT'S GOING ON?? AHHHHH!
(2 minutes)
WHY AM I WEARING THIS GOD-FORSAKEN SHIRT?
(5 minutes)
My muscles are shaking, I am really WHAT THE F---
(land on butt. twist ankle slightly.Here comes Susanne running over....are you OK? do you need an icepack?)
No, no, I am fine. I am strong. I can look tough to all these other women wearing their little tank tops... (continue doing routine)
Would it really be inappropriate to ask for an ice-pack for my butt? Yes, it would. Self,  do NOT ask for an icepack...
(1 minute)
Man, that girl's face is flushed a really unnatural shade of red....crap, that's me. The idiot wearing the long-sleeve shirt
(1 minute)
OH GOOD LORD HAVE MERCY ON MY FAT SOUL. THE PAIN, STOP THE PAIN
(1 minute)
ooohhh, maybe my shoelace will come untied? Nope, looks good. Damnit, why won't my shoe lace just UN-TIE???
Susanne: ooohhh, let's do a power block!!!
OH GOD THE PAIN!!! I'm DYING. DYING.

the end. I limp out of class, bruised, beaten and humbled.

Self: Absolutely do not have the energy to walk back to desk. Must die in locker room....
No, must go blog. The people demand it of me.

We'll meet again step class. We will meet again.

Just as soon as I lay down for 3 days and also buy some tank tops.